Great British Food Revival – Beef and Shellfish

Great British Food Revival

How many shots of a cow's shitty arse can you fit into one half-hour TV programme? That was the question posed by John Torode, restaurateur, Masterchef judge and lover of all things beef, on last night's British Food Revival on BBC2. Sorry, what do you mean that wasn't the question? Look, there's a shitty arse over there. Hold on, if you look behind that posh bloke in wellies there's another...
Ok, so the real question posed by Torode in series two of this excellent show into the promotion of British ingredients (Mr Oliver, take note), was how can we preserve the UK's dwindling rare-breed cattle? The answer, somewhat ironically, is to eat more of the shitty-arsed buggers. And after watching Torode expertly and lovingly create three very different dishes from three different cuts of beef, including a delicious-looking shin of beef stew with star anise, I can't argue with that. Although, god knows how much his fore-rib of beef set him back...
The second-half of the programme saw the very likable Valentine Warner wax lyrical about mussels and cockles. Warner is certainly not a TV natural, coming across as slightly uncomfortable in front of the camera, as if he's just as much surprised to be there as we are to see him. But his passion for ingredients and skill in the kitchen are evident and made me realise I don't eat enough shellfish, especially mussels, which I suppose, is the point of the programme.
He's also a very good actor and seemed very reluctant at one point to tuck into a cockle dish cooked by a female fishmonger, which looked like it contained rather undercooked bacon and onion. "I'll just try some of the cockles," he diplomatically said before shoveling a forkload of the shellfish into his gob.
I have one complaint, however – the sound of Warner slurping almost sexually at a juicy, plump mussel in its shell had me almost reaching for the sick bag. I think I'd rather stare at the crap-encrusted behind of a Longhorn than hear that noise again, thank you very much.